My toxic relationship with food and other things x

I thought I'd write to you again this evening. I think I'll decide whether to post it or not after the finished product is complete, because usually my writing is hit and miss and I'm a little sleepy because I've just eaten Mizonni's meal deal 3 because its Takeaway Thursday, so we'll see.

It's occurred to me that I probably know the people who read my last blog, the first one I wrote to you. There are a number of reasons that I came to this conclusion, the first probably being the fact that I shared the link on my Facebook page, where I am friends with a large quantity of people, all of which I know. Secondly, on my blog post stats it says that the majority of my views had been Ireland, and since the majority of people I know live in Ireland, I put two and two together.
I pondered the idea of writing to entertain my audience, but than I remembered that you're probably all going to keep coming back regardless, and I am using this outlet to document my thoughts to you about my daily life.

As I mentioned before it's Takeaway Thursday; the day of the week that Kyle and I take a walk up to Cabinteely to attend our Slimming World group. After we get weighed and sit through class we come home and order from two separate pizza places (Kyle likes Domino's pizza but it leaves me with a really awful feeling in my chest and my throat (possibly indigestion from the tomato sauce they use) so I get Mizonni's instead). I stayed the same this week, which I suppose I'm pleased for, because it is always much better than gaining weight I think. Recently I have been struggling a lot with my weight, self image, and probably over all confidence. I know that you struggled with these two, from information that I have been fed through other people mainly, and sometimes your diaries a little bit. It saddens me to think that you struggled with your weight the same way that I have been because my perception of myself causes me to be quite low at times and you always seemed so strong and put together. I would hate for you to have thought of yourself as anything less than absolutely incredible, because that is exactly how I saw you. I suppose maybe if you flipped that thought process around you would hate to see me upset about myself as a human, much to the same as Dad is. I promise to try to be kinder to myself, for you.

I originally thought of calling my new blog "My toxic relationship with food and other things" but decided against it. I imagine no positivity can come from a blog with such a name, so I refrained and decided to go back to my roots, I started blogging at the ripe young age of 15, and so instead of a teenage wizard I'm now an adult one, for the most part.

I guess if you were still a constant presence in my life we would talk about my toxic relationship with things, but you decided to tap out early. Don't worry though, I'll let you know all about my struggles as a young woman.

I'll be back soon, I promise.
I'll never leave you for too long.

The Adult Wizard Daughter you left behind xo